Poem: To marry or stay single?

I’ve wondered for a while if I want to get married or not. I feel such a strong purpose to write and illustrate books that will draw people closer to God, and I don’t want to add things in my life that will distract me from that. But, it’s strange that I feel like God has also given me a lot of love to give away. So thus my struggle.

Where My Seeds Lie

I withhold my love like little seeds
hidden in my palm every day.
I’m too busy etching
permanent pictures of trees
Because they will never change or die.


But then I find my two friends
Holding each other in their kitchen.
She rests her hand on his chest
and she whispers something in his ear.
Whatever it is that she says
Just makes him hold her tighter.

But time will bury that love
And those same hands will slam doors
Because their daughter died.

Not the palm she rested on his chest,
Nor all the love they gave their dying little girl
Will be etched
On their daughter’s gravestone.

They will fade away.

So, why?
Why was I given these little seeds of love
To hold in my soft palm
If they are only buried
When I open my hands.


Raw Spoon

4 Responses to Poem: To marry or stay single?

  1. bonus says:

    Three things remain…faith, hope, and love. And the greatest thing is love. So, rather than distract, love expands your perspective. It’s on the job training to write and illustrate books that lead readers to understand God’s immense love for them, which by the way, you do an amazing job at!!

    • raw spoon says:

      Someone else suggested this very verse to me! I think you’re right! Love endures more than anything I can create. Now how do I internalize that!?

      • deepak says:

        I remember that in school my physics teacher told me that the foundational of the universe was made out of time, space and matter. I wonder whether in the spiritual world, we have love, forgiveness and faith. I’m not saying that’s theologically true but maybe there’s something like that I will find when I leave this life.

        Earthly love will disappoint. Mark 12:23 points out that earthly (marital) love will have no connection to that in the eternal life.

        Paul talks about how it’s better (agile in your ministry) to be single in 1 Cor 7 than to be married (where you must minister and take care of your family). What is your calling? Are you called to be single? Are you called to be married? How does your calling tie into these things? In the early century, monks were single to focus on their ministry and calling. Later, there were some married monks who were able to do both. But generally, living a single life gives you more time to do other things. Both are fine paths to take.

        “But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman[j] marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.”

        The media, church, books, western society and modern day art (e.g. Normal Rockwell) has strongly influenced us that we are incomplete without a spouse, family or children. We are complete in Christ – in fact, we are complete!

        When you go into the kitchen, your lens is focused on the hands and fingers. If you had a wide-angle lens you would see yourself standing and what a great place you too are in. If you ask Him, He will show you why you too are in a great place that Paul is alluding to in his letter to the Corinthians.

        • raw spoon says:

          Deepak! that is so beautiful! And I think it perfectly describes where I am. I feel like I don’t want the “worldly troubles”, at least not yet, and I want to keep doing ministry! I do need to be careful that my writing stays my ministry, and doesn’t become a selfish act for fame or something. Thanks for these great, well thought out thoughts, Deepak!